Tag Archives: world-building

Thoughts on Writing – Considering Attire in World Building

Last weekend Isaac and I went to Planet Comicon as volunteers, and we had a lot of fun! During our off time, we got to see some cool panels, spent money in the vendor room (Always have a budget… it helps), and saw a neat cosplay.

However, the side-effect of going to Planet Comicon and NakaKon is the resulting desire to write and draw comics. (Originally we had planned on writing The Multiverse Chronicles in comic book form, but that didn’t happen. We kept the idea of doing illustrations, though).

Long story short, Isaac and I were trying to get Photoshop CS6 installed on his new laptop (and the program wasn’t quite cooperating), so I had some downtime while chatting with the Adobe representatives. Since my mind was side-tracked with the idea of how to convert one of our later planned series, Exiles, into a comic book format, I decided to try sketching one of the main characters.

This was the result:

Exiles Character Concept Art

When I looked at her armor, I realized it really didn’t quite… work (I’ve never been particularly good at drawing armor). It didn’t fit what I had pictured. So I started looking up modern day outfits. The real-life Special Forces uniforms didn’t match the in-universe uniforms, so I looked a bit more to SWAT teams for inspiration. Had Isaac help with the visors… (my first attempt at their helmets looked like something from Hunger Games), and then we looked over both uniforms.

This was the result of the uniform sketches:

Exiles Special Forces Uniform Concept Art

Ultimately, our conversation concluded with us discussing that their outfits should match the reason they need that outfit.

For example, the reason our in-universe Special Forces look like a SWAT team is because when they came about, they were dealing with people who had super powers. People who could throw fireballs or used super strength. People who might use swords just because they had a super skill that made them extraordinary with a blade.

These guys needed to be equipped to deal with powers.

For that reason, Isaac and I considered that the original outfit I drew might not be that far-fetched, at least for certain teams. Having a form of armor around their arms and shoulders would be seriously helpful if they got into melee combat… and might protect against burns. They probably wouldn’t want to have a bunch of pouches on the outside of their uniform (do you really want your equipment easily accessible to someone who is telekinetic)? In fact, their outfits might be modular. If they expected to go up against a certain kind of adversary in a certain situation, they could adjust accordingly.

Look at historical “knights in shining armor” and consider that chainmail was more effective at blocking certain types of weapons and strikes than others. Plate armor also came with certain advantages and disadvantages. If you didn’t take this sort of thing into account (or couldn’t), you were at a major disadvantage. There’s an interesting discussion about the effectiveness of chainmail here.

However, those considerations meant that our newer sketches still worked. In areas where super powers are unheard of (the Community), our Special Forces would be more likely to wear the bulkier outfits with all the pockets and gear that would be effective against ordinary assailants. But if they were going up against a group of rebels, they might be more cautious of what they wore.

When you are developing your world, keep the clothing of your characters in mind. What would they wear for practicality? What, if removed from the equation, might create a problem for them?

For example, in our Exiles story, none of the outfits our main characters have fit them properly. They snatch the clothes from a shipment of cargo, wear what they can, and have to make do with what else they can find, at least for a little while. It’s a problem they have to solve.

You can use the attire of a character to enrich the world, and the culture of that world. Why are they wearing what they’re wearing? Is it because they can afford to? Can’t afford not to? What is available to them?

Have you considered the attire your characters well as part of your world building? Can you think of any examples of outfits that fit really well (or not at all) in their story’s world?

Also, if you want to watch an interesting review of real-life body armor versus armor from science fiction (Halo), The Game Theorists did an in-depth video on Youtube. Found that interesting a while back, and Isaac remembered it today when we were reviewing our concept art.

I hope you enjoyed this post. 🙂

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Thoughts on Writing – Referencing Other Books For Writing Style

One of the things I’ve found helpful when writing specific scenes, especially if I’m aiming for a certain tone or voice, is to read a book with a similar style. For example, in the latest scene I’m editing for The Multiverse Chronicles, I’m working on part two of an episode that has a certain pterosaur’s point of view. In the previous episode (Episode 13: The Test – Part One), the curious pterosaur has been captured by “mangy humans.”

This is the first paragraph from one of the earlier drafts of the intro to Part Two:

 

For days, the mangy men dragged the young pterosaur around the island with their floating hut. If she could keep up, she was rewarded with fresh fish. If she failed to keep up, the pain of the chain around her neck motivated her to try harder. Eventually she got fast, and then the men started taking her to a small village on the main land.

 

Curious about what the antagonists were actually doing, I asked Isaac what he was picturing the antagonists doing (partially because I wanted to know more about the boat). He gave me a bit more detail, and I ended up taking a 700 word scene and turning it into a 1,600 word scene. (Remember what I said before about my tendency to go into detail? This is especially true when I ask him questions about a small scene, then run rampant.)

When I first tried figuring out how we might flesh this out, the imagery that came to mind was an old book. If I have my classics right, that book is Black Beauty, which I vaguely remember as a story about a horse’s life as he’s passed from owner to owner. Though I could be mixing up horse stories, I seem to remember a scene with a cruel or uncaring master, which is similar to what I wanted for this scene.

While I didn’t have a copy of Black Beauty on hand, the Goodreads page for this book had a nice-sized preview which gave me a feel for the writing style, voice, and things I might look for. In fact, reading about the horse’s “breaking” reminded me of handicapped horse races, which involved using weights to slow horses down (I was a fan of horse-racing computer games).

Thus, I wondered if the antagonists might be able to use lead weights to burden our pterosaur protagonist, intending to build her strength so she would fly faster. (Originally, they started up their steamboat and dragged her around the island, making her keep up. But when the pterosaur is mentioned later in the story as being able to fly up to 80 miles per hour without a rider, and a quick Google search revealed that an average steamboat speed was 30 miles per hour… our antagonists had to improvise.)

 

Anyhow, the first paragraph turned into something like this (still needs polishing):

 

After the young pterosaur’s capture, the mangy humans kept her chained to their floating hut. At first, she fought the chains. She snapped at the chain and flapped her wings, but the chain held fast and the boat was anchored, and she found herself pulled from the shore and into the water. Though the humans at the hatchery had kept her enclosed in their dome, they never bound her with a dirty, ragged chain, which tore at her skin and mangled her scales.

 

She was not a happy pterosaur.

 

Later that evening, the weathered man with straw-colored hair approached her with a pile of hemp rope in his hands. She shrieked at him and flared her wings, but he just smiled, revealing a set of broken teeth and grit in his wrinkled skin. The pterosaur snapped at him—let him see that her teeth were not broken! He only laughed. He dumped the rope on the sand and returned to his hut.

 

Shortly thereafter, the two men cornered her. The jeered as she tried to thwap them with her wings, and too soon they had cast a net of rope over her head. Her beak caught and her claws caught and her crest caught, too. She struggled, but the only result was to become further tangled. No escape.

 

Now that she was tethered, the weathered man knelt beside her and bound her beak so she could not bite, tied her claws so she could not scratch, and finally, strapped a leaden pad to her back.

 

They removed the net.

 

Furious, she tried to launch herself at them, only to stumble and collapse in the sand. How heavy were these weights, which prevented her from standing. She shrugged her shoulders, trying to at least sit upright. No such luck, for the weights held her down.

 

A fierce whistle pierced the air and a gust of steam rose from a metal pipe above the floating hut. What a terrible noise!

 

Then suddenly her chains lurched and she was torn into the ocean. Salty water splashed into her eyes and nostrils.

 

The floating hut moved, and the weights dragged her deeper. Her mind screamed that she could not fly, nor swim, so long as the chain held her fast. She sank, still flapping her wings, splashing.

 

This goes on for a bit before we see the end of the original paragraph with the pterosaur in the village, but hey… we get a lot more personality from the characters, more of the world, and more emotion. However, there might be some trimming in the near future. We’ll see what our beta-reader says.

The scene might not feel exactly like Black Beauty, but it isn’t meant to. I was looking for inspiration. Reading sections of a book with a style you want to mimic helps improve similar scenes as those books can give insights into the style of writing, voice, and terminology you might need.

I’ve used this technique several times. Reading Ray Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451 and Something Wicked This Way Comes for the rough draft of Little One, various horror stories for Glitch, and Steelheart for final touches on Distant Horizon.

You don’t want to match the voice exactly, but seeing what other books do or don’t do well can teach you tricks to use in your own writing.

I hope you enjoyed the sneak peek of the next episode of The Multiverse Chronicles. 🙂

Have you found any books to be helpful in developing the stories you’re writing?

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Thoughts on Writing – Developing a Mythology

Now that I’ve launched Magic’s Stealing, it’s time to get back on task with other writing projects. In this case, the next project is The Multiverse Chronicles. My husband plots the story and writes the rough draft, while I polish and edit each episode. I’m currently sitting on episode 11 (I’ve got a few ideas on how to fix the problems I’ve been having with it, thanks to the critique group I attend.), and once I edit episode 12, I’ll go back through the first twelve episodes and look for continuity errors. I’ll also be looking at the sections at the end of each episode, which detail what’s going on behind the scenes and hopefully adds suspense, along with fixing a few areas I have highlighted as “Elders.”

For example:

Alia kicked a pebble. It skipped across the bricks and clanged against the iron fence. One of the guards, an older man with more physical prowess than she could ever hope to achieve, gave her a knowing, sad smile before returning his attention to the passing motor carriages.

She sighed and sat on the edge of the fountain at the center of the courtyard. Water trickled behind her, courtesy of the fountain’s elder statue. The elder’s copper limbs were buffed and polished of the green tarnish that constantly tried to creep in.

(MAYBE HAVE HER THINK SOMETHING ABOUT A RELEVANT ELDER HERE).

A round of applause and raucous laughter burst forth from the open palace doors, and Alia squeezed her eyes shut.

The engagement had been announced.

The reason I made note of areas like this is to remind me that there is a reference to world-building here that hasn’t been developed. In this case, the mythology that develops in the story’s world in place of traditional Greek/Roman mythology.

A quick run-down regarding Multiverse… it’s a pseudo-steampunk world (more fantasy now than steampunk) that takes place in a different universe during the year of what is our world’s 1953. Unlike our world, their world developed “magic” and their progress with technology slowed and took a different track. A few pre-historic and mythical creatures remained alive and well (pterosaurs and dragons), and several world religions didn’t take hold.

While Isaac and I went with the idea that they still developed the Greek/Roman culture to a large extent, the pantheon is different. We determined there would be five elders (which would tie into the five pendants of a later story), who were each people who had made themselves “immortal” by tying their spirits to an a jeweled artifact. At some point, one of these five elders (a trickster) gets greedy and attacks the others for their power, successfully defeating them until a “hero” rises to defeat the trickster and, despite being able to become a spirit herself, chooses to live to an old age and die along with the rest of the normal mortals.

That’s the gist of the mythology, but that was all we had. No detailed names or personalities, which makes it really hard to reference in a story.

So, today, I daydreamed of possible details for the mythology for the elders.

First, it had been a while since Isaac and I talked about the concept, so I’d forgotten about the hero existing, and instead placed the first Dragon Queen in the hero’s place.

Second, since this was supposed to be set in Greek/Roman times, I figured I’d draw on what I knew of that mythology to create personalities for the elders. I wasn’t too worried about it being exact, however, since this is a very, very alternate timeline. (Though I did do a bit of quick research once I started writing this post).

Third, the mythology of the elders doesn’t need to be exact since a lot of time has passed in the story, and lore naturally splinters with time.

Fourth, the artifacts each is elder is connected to would be probably be something special to them, and thus the people who worship them might swear upon those objects (by Athena’s sword…)

Fifth, this particular world already has ground rules in regards to what can be done with the various powers (such as only being able to have three powers before the human body begins to breaks down) and certain aspects of later lore (such as the jewels their artifacts would hold, since those are tied to the pendants I mentioned earlier).

So, with those things in mind, this is what I came up with.

For the first elder, I chose Athena as the base personality. I decided she would have shapeshifting (thanks to the story about Arachne… and the song “The Goddess and the Weaver” by Spiral Dance that  I now have stuck in my head), life-spirit (possibly… I may change this later), and super intellect (for being the goddess of wisdom). Her artifact would be based on ruby, for power.

For the second elder, I kept thinking of Ares and Hephaestus (Sad to say, I thought one was Greek and the other Roman, not that they were brothers. *Ahem.* Google searches are helpful). I debated making him a fire elemental and having him be a blacksmith, but that seemed too typical (I already have one of those guy’s in Magic’s Stealing, after all). Instead, I gave him a rare extended power… the ability to manipulate the shape of any metal. (Think ‘metal bending’ from Avatar: The Last Airbender). I’m debating on having him be the brother of the first elder. His artifact would be based on sapphire, for creation.

For the third elder, I decided he would be based somewhat on Demeter (for the harvest… and possibly referencing fertility, though a quick search shows that Aphrodite is better suited to that side of things). I also considered having him based on Artemis (which would put him at odds with the fertility reference), and giving him a relation to “the hunt.” Ultimately, I decided that he would have plant manipulation, beast mastery, and life-spirit for his powers. He is the elder of all things related to growth, and he’s the go-to elder if someone wants to request a bountiful harvest. His artifact would be based on an emerald, for growth.

For the fourth elder, I considered giving him time-bending powers, but then I realized that I was going to end up with six elders, and so he got cast aside and is now the “forgotten” elder. Don’t know if I’ll ever reference him or not.

Anyway, I’m thinking of giving this guy the ‘death’ extended power, which allows him to pretty much kill anyone without a second thought. (A very rare power, and obviously dangerous). If I recall, Isaac and I have that power set as being the combination of life-spirit, radiation, and carbon alchemy. (So he’d be a Hades/Thanatos reference, perhaps?) I’m thinking that he and the first elder were business partners when they were still human, and the first elder used her intellect with his alchemy to figure out how to make themselves spirits (and relatively immortal), and thus rise to power. His artifact would be  based on a diamond, for command over life.

For the fifth elder, I went less the way of a trickster, as originally planned, and instead considered referencing Pandora and/or Prometheus. This elder would have a “jack of all trades” power, which meant that she would be able to do minor dealings with all the elements involved, and she would be of the curious sort. Her artifact would be based on amber, for binding/time.

Based on these personalities, I figure that they successfully ruled their subjects for a long time, until “Pandora” got bored and decided to see how far she could take her powers. She steals a powerful artifact from “Demeter,” and goes about trying to create a strange land of her own, which would later be known as the Deep, a weird forest that, once entered, cannot be escaped. However, her experiments wreak havoc on the surrounding land, and the other elders attempt to attack her. However, due to the various magics in the Deep, and “Hades’ ” attempt to use radiation (known to harm spirits) to subdue her, he accidentally transforms her into a wraith-like monster, and she in turn attacks the elders.

I wasn’t satisfied with this.

Instead of wreaking havoc intentionally, what if “Pandora” stole the secret for becoming an elder from the others, and gave this to the regular humans around her (where we get the Prometheus reference)? Seeing that she’s reduced their power, the other elders attempt to contain her by creating the Deep (a labyrinth of sorts), but when “Hades” attempts to do the final containment with his powers over light, he overdoes his power, which then conflicts with the strange magic in the area and transforms “Pandora” into a wraith-like spirit, who must now feed off other spirits to sustain herself. She goes mad, and the first person she attacks upon breaking free is “Hades.” She then proceeds to torment the land in elemental whirlwinds and firestorms as she searches out the other elders to kill them.

(At one point, I considered that the elders would either go into hiding, according to those who might still worship them, or that “Athena” and “Hephaestus” would survive long enough to seek out a promising young woman who could talk to dragons, thus leading into the Dragon Queen lore, but then Isaac reminded me that the main cultures in the Multiverse story at this point didn’t worship them, and that the Hero, not the First Dragon Queen, slayed the trickster.)

She eventually does kill the elders, and continues wreaking havoc until a lone hero rises up to defeat her (we can thank the anime, The Devil is a Part-Timer, for this little bit of story). Once “Pandora” is defeated, the Hero could choose to become immortal herself, but decides instead to end the reign of the spirits over them, and thus ends the time of the elders.

I still like the idea of her stealing Demeter’s artifact, so maybe she does do that, but nothing is set in stone. A lot of this will probably change.

But this version does work well in connection with the pendants, because now a certain alchemist in one of the later stories has research fodder that can be used to achieve his goals. Everything ties together, and there might even be a bit of a cycle from this story which will be relevant to other stories in this universe.

Maybe. We’ll see.

I talked to Isaac about the latest idea for the history of the elders, and he seemed to like it. We still need to come up with names for them, preferably based on Greek or Roman names, but I suspect it would be better not to name them directly since they’re supposed to be characters in their own right.

But, more importantly for now, I have a loose mythology that I can reference in Multiverse. Now that statue Alia sits by can finally have a name. 🙂

I hope you enjoyed this post. How deep do you like to delve into the mythology of your fictional universes?

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Thoughts on Writing – Creating a Fantasy Map

I recently received my final beta-reader comments for Magic’s Stealing, and I’ve been making edits (I’ll be doing a cover reveal soon!), but today I’m going to focus on one of the ideas that the beta-reader suggested, which was to include a map of the region.

A lot of fantasy stories include a map of some sort as a way to help readers envision the layout of the land, or the city where the story is taking place. Maps can be used to enhance the feeling of the story (seriously, take a look at the map of Middle Earth) and one article I read suggested that a well-drawn map, which includes elements of the story, can make the world feel more real. It’s sort of like having an artifact from the world itself.

I’ve debated before on including a map, but I originally put the idea aside because I wasn’t sure if I could make it look professional, and also because I didn’t want to lock down the distances before I finished the series.

Then my husband pointed out, having a map would be a good tool for future reference. Not only that, but I wouldn’t have to include it in the first edition of the ebook. I could wait until I release the print edition, then update the ebook at that time.

Anyway, let’s take a look at the steps I’m taking to create the map. I have a rough guide. When I wrote the first draft of this story twelve years ago, I also drew a map in Paint. It’s horribly inaccurate

The estate where Toranih lives probably shouldn’t be as large as the capital city of Cirena. The Cantingen Islands probably shouldn’t be quite so tiny. And there are plenty of other problems.

SBibb - Old Cirena Map

Original map… made many years ago

My husband suggested that I start by writing down the places referenced in the story, then taking note of their directions and the amount of time it takes to travel from one place to get to another, as mentioned in the story.

So I went through Magic’s Stealing and searched for key phrases related to traveling. Minute, hour, road, travel, east, west… etc. I didn’t include directions within buildings, such as going downstairs. Just the kingdom and the cities.

This is what I found in Magic’s Stealing through a basic search.

Fifteen minutes later, Toranih reached the place of the healers. (From the seer’s cottage, jogging)

 

In minutes they had left the square behind and pounded into the lower city. (Riding hard on horseback)

 

“We’re two hours from Viyna. A guard could stop here, and we’d be reasonably undercover…” (At the mountain forge, riding on horseback, not rushing)

 

They fled into the heavy rain, mud spattering them on the road to Viyna. (From the Covonilayno estate)

 

…and then stormed through yet another portal into the temple in the northern district of Ashan. (Directions within a large city)

 

The girl was cold and shadowy, colder than the northern village of Reveratch. (Region layout)

 

“Go to the northern tunnel. Tell Cafrash to send more of his shadows into the city…” (Directions of a tunnel)

 

“This is it. Sid-Dreh.”//“What’s Sid-Dreh?”//Siklana pushed Toranih out of the way and squinted at the plaque. “South and west, respectively…” (Cardinal directions in Old Cirenan)

 

…but many of them used the communal oven in the marketplace that had developed in the eastern side of the city. (Layout of Viyna)

 

The marketplace brimmed with travelers from Ashan, the eastern port. (Region directions)

 

The ribbons streamed into the sky, a dazzling array of colors, then fled East, away from the city in a glaring river. (Direction the magic is stolen, from Viyna to the mountain forge)

 

“…If the Trickster branches into the Islands or crosses the sea to the eastern lands, there is no telling how quickly he could rise.” (Region layout)

 

Ferta was several days out, even by carriage. (Regional layout)

 

“…When I’m at the academy, I practice in the forest outside of the city walls.” (Reference to Cirena City)

While I may not want to draw out the tunnels on the main map, having a map may make the tunnels be a little more understandable. At this point, though, I’m seeing potential for some interesting back story. How far out do these tunnels actually extend? As you’ll see in a bit, the distances between cities and towns is much greater than the original map suggests. Do the tunnels extend to other cities? Are there towns or dwellings I haven’t mentioned before? Or do they open in the middle of nowhere?

Anyway, instead of trying to mark out the full range of a city or estate, I’m considering following the lead of a few other maps I looked at, which use a basic symbol to designate the location of a city or important landmark. In order to figure out the rough scale, I’ll need to look up the average travel times of riding horseback or walking, and then place my locations based on that scale.

According to this site: http://www.lrgaf.org/guide/writers-guide.htm horses can walk 3-5 miles per hour, trot 8-10 miles per hour, canter at 15 miles per hour, or gallop at 25-30 miles per hour. Now, keeping in mind that weather, type of horse, and condition of horse will effect speed, let’s go with the idea that we’re talking about a horse with decent stamina and who hasn’t been tired from a lot of riding. And let’s go with the idea that the roads in Cirena are of decent quality, and the map is counting on non-rainy days. A general internet search suggests that a fit person can walk 4 miles in an hour (or 1 mile every fifteen minutes), on relatively flat terrain.

So… now that we’ve got some numbers, let’s look back at the descriptions pulled from the story.

Fifteen minutes later, Toranih reached the place of the healers.

In this scene, Toranih is jogging/quickly walking to the temple. She is in reasonably good physical condition, as she’s trying to train to be a guardsman. I had a hard time finding a single average for jogging, so let’s just say that she’s walking. In this case, she walked a mile to reach the temple from the seer’s cottage. If the temple is supposed to be relatively central in the city, then Viyna may be a couple miles wide.

In minutes they had left the square behind and pounded into the lower city.

The characters are riding hard in this scene, but they are likely cantering instead of galloping due to street layout and rain. At the quoted 15 miles per hour, a quarter of a mile per minute, and let’s say 4 minutes, then they have traveled 1 mile from the courthouse to the lower city.

“We’re two hours from Viyna. A guard could stop here, and we’d be reasonably undercover…”

Here, the characters reached the mountain forge by riding on horseback. They took it easy, probably walking or trotting, which puts us at 3-10 miles per hour. Let’s say they traveled at an average of 5 miles per hour. The mountain forge would be roughly 10 miles from Viyna, or if they had cars and a 60 mph speed limit, ten minutes to drive. Picture someplace that takes you ten minutes to drive to on the highway, and now you have the rough distance. (And the kingdom suddenly feels much smaller).

It was going to be a long week (of traveling through the wood).//Scene break//After a full day of assuring her sister that not only were bandits rare in this forest, but she was protected by two mages and– ahem– a well-aimed knife thrower, Toranih finally led Starlight to the forest edge. The dusty road from Viyna to Ashan wound its way in the distance around the edge of the forest. Though the road was smoother, the route jogged several miles north and was usually filled with travelers, adding almost a week to the trip when a couple days of hard riding through the forest would do.

They’re in a hurry to get through the woods, but it’s been raining and they’re somewhat tired. Let’s say their pace averages a fast walk, at five miles per hour, for seven hours of the day. That’s 35 miles a day, or 175 miles after five days of traveling. According to the narration, the road between Viyna and Ashan that avoids the forest adds a day to the trip, whereas hard riding (when possible), gets them quickly through the forest. Say ‘hard riding’ is 7 hours a day (based on 7.5 hours I read somewhere on the internet…which I don’t remember where now and may not be all that accurate) at 10 miles per hour due to rough terrain, so that would be 70 miles per day, or 140 miles in two days.

If they took the road directly from Viyna to Ashan, instead, then they would be walking 7 hours a day, 4 miles per hour, and let’s go with a full seven days, approximately 196 miles. Granted, if they stop to rest one or two of those days, and that’s been taken into account, then the distance isn’t quite as great.

But I went ahead and plugged 196 miles into Google Maps to get a comparative distance with a road I’m used to traveling, and eeps.

Ranging from 140 to 200 miles wide, that forest is much larger than what I was picturing.

This is why having a scaled map is a useful tool for world building. Even if you don’t give the readers the actual scale, you can figure out relative distances without having them wobbling all over the place.

So, for my test run, let’s say that this forest is 140 miles. I picture the edge of the forest not being too far from Viyna, maybe a quarter mile, and maybe a couple miles from Ashan. For the Cantingen Islands (which are mentioned in the second book as being ‘near’ to Ashan but without a more concrete detail), I went to look at the distances from other islands to a mainland. Miami, Florida, to Bailey Town, Bahamas, is about 55 miles out, according to Google Maps and a trusty ruler.

Let’s say the Cantingen Islands are 60 miles from Ashan.

Now, let’s look at another city…

Ferta was several days out, even by carriage.

Horses trot at 8-10 miles per hour, and I read that a pair of horses pulling a carriage would move faster than the average horse alone, so let’s go with 10 miles per hour. Then 8 hours of riding for 4-5 days, we’re looking at around 320 to 400 miles away.

It doesn’t even fit on my initial map attempt.

SBibb - Cirena Map Test Run

Then my husband reminded me that people rarely travel in straight lines. There’s hills, glades, rivers, lakes, avoiding certain unfriendly estates, resting the horses… a number of things that could increase the time, but not the distance.

So I took my current references, redrew a map that actually includes geography, replaced the cities with the scale as a general guide, not rule, and now I plan to check the narration to revise for the updated travel times (or have them be a little more accurate, anyway). I don’t plan for this to be the final version (since it’s missing a few cities and roads), and I probably won’t put this in the ebook.

But it should make a lot more sense than the original version–other than the fact that this map has the mountain forge at 90 miles away from Viyna, which doesn’t exactly work for the story.

Oh, well. It’s a starting point.

SBibb - Cirena Map Updated

I hope you enjoyed this post. 🙂

Have you ever tried making a fantasy map? What difficulties have you run into?

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Thoughts on Writing – Developing a Magic System

I’m in the process of polishing Magic’s Stealing, and a beta reader pointed out a plot hole regarding one of my magic systems. Since my mind is now stuck on working through that problem, today I’m going to go into the process of developing magic systems.

In Magic’s Stealing there are three types of magic: ribbon magic, string magic, and word magic. The problem system is ribbon magic, which is the most common. It’s the magic that gets stolen, leaving the two main characters as the only mages.

As it stands in the current version of the story, ribbon mages either have all-magic—which allows a user to do most any common type of ribbon magic that they train for—and there is specific magic—in which the user is only good with one specific power.

Depending on their specialty, the colors of their ribbons vary. For example, a fire mage has yellow ribbons, while a light mage has turquoise ribbons. The problem is that once we get into all-magic, where there is no official specialty, the color system breaks down.

For example:

Toranih: Green ribbons. All-magic. She’s not particularly good with magic, though her specialty is telekinesis. She is also seen shape-changing and using her powers to heal wounds.

Daernan: Blue ribbons. All-magic. Specialty of shape-changing. Also seen casting fireballs and healing wounds.

Siklana: Turquoise ribbons. Specific magic. Specialty of light manipulation. Enchants light crystals for others to be able to see magic.

Shevanlagiy: Green ribbons. All-magic. She is seen creating portals, using telekinesis, and there is a mention of her enchanting a light crystal.

Cafrash: Yellow ribbons. Specific magic. Specialty of fire manipulation. (He’s a blacksmith).

We don’t see many different ribbon colors in the first book because the main character, Toranih, can’t see magic without a light crystal, and magic is stolen shortly thereafter. However, a beta reader pointed out that from the way I describe the ribbons in the book, the color of the ribbons seem to be based on the magic user, rather than on the type of magic. (Note that Toranih and Daernan can do the same things, but Daernan’s magic is blue, while Toranih’s magic is green.)

So I took a second look at how I explained ribbon magic. The only truly consistent piece of information was in regards to the strength of magic, and even that is not directly stated. (Ribbons are influenced by how often magic is used. Thin ribbons reveal magic that has been neglected. Thick ribbons show well-practiced magic. Like a muscle, the more practice a mage has, the stronger their ribbons will be). The other consistent deal with ribbon magic is the use of a certain color pertaining to a certain mage.

Since I want consistency in the system, especially as the series continues to evolve, I brainstormed a few ideas that might make the system stronger.

It didn’t immediately come together. The brainstorming process is messy, and you can see that from the ideas I have here:

Importance in the shade of magic: Inherent at birth. The more vibrant the color of magic, the more likely a mage has all-magic, or can do more with his ribbons. The paler the magic, the more specific their magic is, limiting them to what can be done.

Importance in the color of magic: Inherent at birth. Technically, similar colors should be similar powers. We also run into the problem that if the shade of magic says that the paler the magic, the more limited the mage, then we shouldn’t be able to tell what kind of magic a limited mage has. Their magic would be white.

So…

I wondered if I could flop these around.

The deeper the shade of magic, the more specific the power. This would be consistent with immortal magic, a type of ribbon magic which is described in the book as being “silver with black edges.” Their magic tends to be a little more all-encompassing (even though they each have their specialties). When Toranih and Daernan are granted a tiny bit of an immortal’s power, their ribbons take on an iridescent sheen. Which would make sense if the more all-encompassing their power, the more silvery-white it became.

Granted, that still doesn’t help me look at magic in terms of a visible light spectrum based on their current ribbon colors. But, if you take all the colors of the rainbow and put them together in the form of light, the light is white… which fits the idea of all-magic being paler in color (though brighter in luminescence).

That in mind, mortal mages would probably still have a visible color of magic because they don’t have nearly the kind of power that an immortal has.

Let’s look at the specialties in terms of a rainbow spectrum… with the addition of turquoise.

Red – (Not mentioned in this story)

Orange – (Not mentioned in this story)

Yellow – Fire

Green – Telekinesis

Turquoise – Light manipulation

Blue – Shapeshifting

Indigo – (Not mentioned in this story)

Violet – Portals?

Now, if specialties that are related are close together on the spectrum, then light manipulation should be more of a lime green or yellow-green than turquoise, and thus be closer to fire. If I go with the idea that each type of ribbon magic has a different color, unrelated, then those could remain the same.

But I still wasn’t really happy with this. I liked the idea of light manipulation being turquoise and fire being yellow, sticking straight to a rainbow spectrum is limiting, and besides that, this system still doesn’t help me with all-magic users.

I talked about this conundrum with my husband, Isaac, and the resulting discussion gave me the idea that maybe mages shouldn’t have one single color of magic. Instead, their ribbons could vary with multiple colors, depending on what kind of magic they have the potential to use. In this case, Daernan’s primary ribbon color would be blue, because he’s a gifted shapeshifter, but he would also have several thick yellow ribbons for fire, along with a few green ribbons for telekinesis and whatever other color I assign to the magic he practices. As he’s not particularly skilled with something like portals, but he’s capable, he might have a couple thin violet ribbons that no one really notices because they get lost among his blue ribbons.

Let’s take a quick look at a before-and-after of scene involving magic. This is how the section reads before I make changes:

The owl shrugged and puffed out its plumage like a feather duster. Not my fault you’re so jumpy.

Toranih crossed her arms. Though faint in the moonlight, the crystal’s twilight revealed blue ribbons swirling thick through Daernan’s owlish body.

Coming? The blue ribbons carried Daernan’s thoughts to Toranih’s mind, and she fought the urge to swipe them away.

However, if I make the changes I’m considering, the scene might read something like this:

The owl shrugged and puffed out its plumage like a feather duster. Not my fault you’re so jumpy.

Toranih crossed her arms. Though faint in the moonlight, the crystal’s twilight revealed various blue and yellow and pink ribbons swirling thick through Daernan’s owlish body.

Coming? The pink ribbons carried Daernan’s thoughts to Toranih’s mind, and she fought the urge to swipe them away.

Granted, I haven’t decided that pink is telepathy, but it’s an idea. This early in the story, readers should be able to immediately understand that different ribbons do different things. Before this segment we see Siklana’s turquoise ribbons of light magic, and after this segment we see Toranih using her own scrawny blue ribbons to transform into an owl.

If I go this route, I’ll need to make a chart of which colors represent which specialty, and I’ll have to be careful in editing to make sure the use of ribbon magic remains clear and consistent. But this last change might enhance the world, as well as fix a plot hole.

The system is still in development, but I hope this post gives you a bit of insight into how such a system can be developed. 🙂

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“Research That Makes Good Fiction” – Guest Blog – Natascha N. Jaffa

We have a guest blogger with us today, Natascha N. Jaffa. Hopefully you’ll find her advice helpful, whether you’re considering trade publishing or self-publishing. 🙂

     

Natascha Jaffa dedicates her experience to helping writers grow through her editing firm, http://www.spjediting.com/, which she considers the best job in the world. When she isn’t editing, you can catch her snowboarding, rock climbing, or training for her first Ragnar Relay. She’s an active PRO member of Romance Writers of America, an editor for SoCal’s Mystery Writers of America chapter and is published in suspense and romance as Nichole Severn. Writers can find her on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.

http://www.facebook.com/pages/SPJ-Editing/271063536289907

https://twitter.com/#!/SPJEditing

http://www.linkedin.com/pub/natascha-jaffa/50/258/98b

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“Research That Makes Good Fiction”

Natascha N. Jaffa

No matter what genre you write, accurate research pulls your readers into your story. Plotting, formatting, world-building and character research are just four items on a list of many that make your reader unable to put that book down.

Plotting research. A lot of writers write by the “seat of their pants” and that works for them. Others plan every detail of their work, following a close outline, but, no matter how you plot (or don’t), there is a basic guide to follow in fiction.

This includes A) introducing your reader to your character’s ordinary world, B) diving into adventure, C) accumulation of bad things happening, D) answering the call to adventure, E) gathering friends and allies, F) the point of no return G) things falling apart H) your crisis or “black moment”, I) resolution, and J) your happy ever after.

In all actuality, your plot should look something like this: 

 

Larry Brooks has an excellent book you may want to check out called Story Structure Demystified or you may want to look into Martha Alderson’s The Plot Whisperer for more info. Her site http://www.blockbusterplots.com/index.html has actual video of her lessons if you don’t want to read!

Formatting research. It’s a simple idea, but there is a lot of information to sift through in regards to what should be included in the header of your MS, where page numbers should start, the actual font of your MS, and what the title page should look like and include. Authors use their own formatting in a lot of cases, but that’s because they’re allowed to. They’ve become accustomed to what their editor is expecting. Therefore, we must research. Find a copy of Formatting and Submitting Your Manuscript by Chuck Sambuchino. It will answer those questions whether you’re submitting a short story, a full novel, or an article to an agent or editor. Remember, the more professional your MS looks, the more professional you look.

World-building research. I’ve read so many manuscripts, especially paranormal, in which the writer doesn’t take the time to actually build the world they’ve created in their book. Readers want to know an era’s/world’s clothing, language, mannerisms, government, architecture, atmosphere, customs/traditions, and culture. Nailing down the details is what keeps your reader engrossed in the story and believing they are right there with your character.

Regency is a huge in the market right now and it requires a lot of research. This means reading history books, watching films in which the era is correctly portrayed, finding other novels in the same time period as your book and learning new words. Unless you’ve done your research, readers will see exactly how much time you took to get it right.

A word of warning: world-building research can become addicting. Never research more than you need to write about or you’ll never finish the book!

Character research. Characters make the book. This is the reason readers will pick up yours, so make them believe your characters are real. This includes setting your character’s goal, motivation, and conflict and not just for your protagonist and antagonist. Every character has an agenda. This is what drives your plot. Tell the reader what, why and why not. A great resource I recommend for every fiction writer is Debra Dixon’s Goal, Motivation and Conflict. Her tips will make your character multi-layered and believable.

You also need to paint a picture of your characters for your readers. A lot of writers actually find a photo that best suits their purposes and refer to it often to keep their descriptions clear throughout the book.

You as the writer need to know your character inside and out. Their job, their likes, dislikes, relationships with family and friends, favorite foods and everything else you can think of. Some are a little easier than others to construct, but either way, it must be done. Maybe you have a protagonist who is a cop. The best way to learn about your character and step into their shoes is to interview a cop. Find out how that officer spends his day, how many years of training he had to go through before he was allowed on the force, what tests he had to take. When it comes to the simpler things, Leigh Michaels has a great list of questions to ask your character in her book On Writing Romance.

 

There is a similar warning here as with world-building research. Don’t get too into your interviews or studying. Learn just enough that you can confidently portray your characters to your readers and not have to stress about inaccurate details.

Dan Brown’s Angels and Demons, Carolyn Jewel’s historical romances and even Laurell K. Hamilton’s Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter series are all great examples of well-researched fiction. These authors have taken the time to get the details right in their plotting, formatting, world-building and character development, drawing readers into the story and not pushing them out by focusing on incorrect information.

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Well, there you have it! That’s all for today, but hopefully you found something useful. Thanks, Natasha, for joining in. 🙂

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